Sometimes, it’s harder to receive kindness than to give it.
After my shift at the hospital, one of the NAs I had met that day offered to drive me home. However, I declined, thinking I would be a burden, since my dorm is so close to the hospital. After I got back to my dorm, I kept thinking how it would have been nice to take that quick 5-minute ride to receive her kindness and maybe even get to know her a little better. She seemed genuine and I could see it as I precepted with her at work.
I always hate asking others for rides. But this time, it was her who asked first, which threw me off guard. I’m not spontaneous enough to go with the flow.
Next time, if I’m ever in that position, I will accept. If there is a next time. If not, I want to pay it forward and offer someone a ride when I have my car.
Sometimes, It’s so much easier to give than to receive. It’s such a paradox. As selfish humans, we receive without much thought when it comes to our parents or family. But when it comes to strangers, maybe it’s because I trust myself more, but I tend to be more willing to give than to receive. All I know is that her act of kindness makes me want to pay it forward.